Approaching Women: Fear, Intimidation and Zen
Geplaatst op 03-04-2024
Categorie: Lifestyle
Zen is a school of Mahayana Buddhism. The Japanese word Zen is derived from the Chinese word Chán, which in turn is derived from the Sanskrit word dhyana, which means “meditation” or “meditative state”.
How can I be like myself… But be a more powerful self said a guy in a recent interview with david wygant…
That is exactly what you should be asking yourself. That’s what everyone wants. They want more life experience through self expression of their true selves. I think this comes back to zen dating advice in a way
This guy in question - “steve” had completely lost the plot when he resorted to using card tricks to impress girls but I am really pleased he had the courage to let his voice be heard. It means there are millions of other guys that are resorting to similar false methods.
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No wonder girls are so guarded about being approached by random guys… If 60% of them have packs of cards or similar items and their lying about their intent then it’s natural to pull away and reject that sort of thing.
Dave mentions :
Where do you see women where you are most comfortable!
This should ring an important bell in your head. Dave wygant the dating guru is suggesting that you need to be in a comfortable environment.
Meeting women should not be a chore or a stressful painful process. It should be a natural pain free exiting time for you.
You know this and you want it to be… Steve was saying in the video that he wanted to be himself but a more powerful self. He knew all along that the monkey on his back was causing him to doubt is own thoughts all the time..
He did not feel powerful and therefore was not attractive to women.
The indecisive thoughts in his head were being externally portrayed as weird fidgety mannerisms and stuttering. Your brain likes to focus on one thing at a time.
If you cant get it off the subject of screwing this conversation up or getting the card trick right your screwed. Your mind has got to be focused on powerful confidence and most importantly on the GIRL.
It’s always about them… It always has been and it always will be -- they dont want to know about some stupid card trick or how your president of your own company. They want you to ask them about the dress their wearing and how you think it looks fantastic on them today. They want you to ask about their shoes or hair in the most normal way possible.
It comes back to confidence but confidence only comes when you really know and feel comfortable in your environment.
Confidence with women comes from knowing that you are in control. Guys get so tense and scared because they think they have to approach groups of women in bars and clubs but you DON’T have to do that.
Get used to talking to the check out girl in the supermarket… Join clubs and social event, not because you want to meet girls but because you are exited about the clubs activities. Perhaps you love reading, well there are a ton of emotionally open women at book clubs right? Lame example I get it but you get the picture.
Pick up and approaching at bars and clubs feels weird for you because it’s an un-natural environment.
Put yourself in an environment in which your feel comfortable and all of a sudden you feel empowered and confident.
If you happen to love cooking up an amazing home cooked meal you have yourself a great environment and to find women + a great date that weekend you could bring up. Asking a girl about her food choice is a pretty natural thing to do right? A market like whole foods is great for this -- it still might be weird for you to approach a women in a food store but you have to start somewhere.
But now you dont actually have to approach women to get dates. If you live in a large city or your happy to drive to one then a site like Loveawake, Plentyoffish, Craigslist, Match.com etc are great frictionless ways to set up dates for the weekend. You could actually suggest that you meet up at whole foods with a fellow foodie and buy some amazing fresh produce to take home and cook with each other. This gives you both an active common interest to talk about and a fun interactive date.